Sunday, August 30, 2009

Creating a Name-Dropping Extravaganza of a Bio

Wondering how to write a really cool classical music bio? The Cereal List has created several bio templates for different types of classical performers so you can generate just as much hubris as the musicians you admire. Here is the template for intimidating your chamber music opponents:
An active chamber musician, [NAME] has performed with the groups [LIST UP TO 30 CHAMBER ENSEMBLES YOU HAVE PERFORMED WITH, STARTING WITH THE ONE PEOPLE ARE MOST LIKELY TO HAVE HEARD OF AND ENDING WITH YOUR COLLEGE'S BAND/ORCHESTRA/CONTEMPORARY MUSIC ENSEMBLE]. [HE/SHE] has also performed with [LIST UP TO 15 MUSICIANS PEOPLE MAY HAVE HEARD OF. IF YOU'VE NEVER PLAYED WITH A FAMOUS MUSICIAN, LIST ANY FAMOUS MUSICIANS WHO MAY HAVE PERFORMED WITH YOUR SCHOOL ORCHESTRA TO INCLUDE MARGINALLY FAMOUS TEACHERS AT YOUR SCHOOL] and under the baton of [LIST CONDUCTORS]. In addition, [NAME] has recorded for the [NAME OF RECORD LABEL] record label.

3 comments:

  1. The gears are turning!
    Thanks,
    J

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  2. Writing a bio can be a painful process sometimes. What do you leave out, what do you play up? In the end, let your actual work speak for itself and try to avoid the padding. At least, that's my 2 cents.

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  3. This looks suspiciously familiar.... I too have performed with [NAME]!

    ReplyDelete